


By your side

by brokebackdeancas



Category: Supernatural
Genre: First Kiss, Injured Dean Winchester, M/M, Nearly Human Castiel (Supernatural), Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:40:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22897375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokebackdeancas/pseuds/brokebackdeancas
Summary: Dean got seriously wounded during a hunt and Castiel doesn't have enough grace to heal him.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 24





	By your side

Dean was lying down on the ground, trying to hold on to the tree behind him. His shirt was soaked in blood, and he couldn't see his injury, but he knew it was way worse than he thought it would be. The fabric of his clothes was sticking to his abdomen, and he let out a groan trying to lift it up. The wound went from one side to the other, and it was at least 3 inches deep. Dean almost couldn't feel his legs, and he was pretty sure one of his ribs – if not even more – was smashed, considering all the bruises he could see on his upper body in the dark. The pain was steady, no cramps, no stitches, just needles pinching him over every inch of his skin. Dean, as a hunter, was used to the pain, but nothing ever physically hurt like that. The idea of a slow, painful death had never crossed his mind. Dean had always thought he would have gone out gun blazing, instant death, maybe just the time to say see you on the other side to his brother. He had never wanted to see Billie take him more in his goddamned life.

Instead of seeing the brown leather jacket he was hoping for, he saw an old trenchcoat. Cas was running towards him with a worried look on his face.

"Dean?! What happened to you?"

Cas knelt down to Dean's side so that they could face each other. When Dean tried to talk, he realized how hard that was.

"W-wraith got to me... caught me unprepared..."

"Okay Dean, please, don't talk, I'll– I'll try to heal you," Cas said briefly, softly placing a hand on Dean's abdomen. The angel had very little grace left, they both knew, but Cas was ready to risk it to save Dean. Or to, at least, ease his pain. He immediately shifted his gaze, locking it on Dean's eyes, when he saw the hunter's hand slowly reaching his.

"No," said Dean in a feeble whisper.

"What do you mean no?"

"Cas... you're low on mojo... I can't let you do this..."

He was right. Castiel was almost 100% certain that he wouldn't have been able to fully cure Dean, but if he had used all of the grace left, the hunter would have made it to the bunker. Even if Sam was nowhere to be seen, and without his powers, Castiel wouldn't have been able to carry Dean to the car.

"Cas... I'm not gonna let you... use what remains of your grace... to save the unsavable..." Dean's words were almost audible.

Cas opened wide his eyes, not believing what Dean had just said.

"Unsavable?! Dean, I can heal that in a minimum part, but it would be enough to make you survive. We'll take you to the bunker and you'll completely recover, it's a scratch, c'mon–"

Dean tightly grabbed the side of Castiel's trenchcoat with his free hand, pulling him closer. The hunter was gasping for air but he still managed to look somehow relaxed.

"You're not gonna waste it, Cas." He coughed, spitting out blood, and squeezed his hand on Castiel's, pressing on his wound. "It's okay... please, you may... you may need your powers again."

Cas started shaking his head. He couldn't lose Dean, not again. Especially cause he was sure this would have been the last time. 

"I need them now. I need them to heal you."

"Cas...it's gonna be okay. We are gonna be okay... you have everything to need to win this... I'll just be watching from somewhere else." Dean had a tender smile on his face.

"...you can't be serious, Dean... please, we all need you!"

Dean tried to laugh a little, but he covered the following cough with the hand that was holding the trenchcoat.

"Cas, there is nothing for me here... you are all gonna be great even without me. But I want... a big funeral, okay? Everyone has to be there, I want you all to–" cough, "–to say beautiful words to my cadaver, and... light me up, like it should be done. Please... will you do that for me, Cas?"

Castiel was feeling a mix of sadness, anger, love. He wanted to punch Dean, but at the same time give him a hug and tell him everything is gonna be great.

"Dean, you are a lot more worth than you think, okay? You really think I rebelled to entire heaven for some worthless human? I rebelled for you. You are everything that matters. I can't... I can't let you go away like this. I–"

Castiel had just realized how close they actually were. He had a warm feeling in his guts, the one he always used to have when he was around Dean. Cas placed a hand on his cheek – keeping the other on his abdomen – feeling the dried up blood on his face. He closed his eyes and gently made their foreheads touch.

"I'm so sorry Cas... there are so many things I would have liked to do, with Sam... with you... I'm so sorry that I can't."

The angel was sick of hearing Dean talk like that, so he made him shut up. Cas closed the distance between them and placed soft kisses on Dean's lips.

"I'm sorry too, Dean."

"Tell me you're gonna be okay."

Cas took a deep breath. "...how?"

"Cas. I need to hear you say... you're gonna be okay. I need to know."

"Okay... okay, we're gonna be okay. I'm gonna be okay."

Castiel turned the hand he had on Dean's wound and tightly held the other's. Dean weakly squeezed it back, gaining all his strengths to say his last words.

"Tell Sammy that I love him... and that I asked you to not waste any grace. Cas... I'm always gonna be by your side... got it?"

"Got it."

Castiel watched the light in Dean's eyes slowly fading away, and when he could not feel a heartbeat anymore, he laid his head on the hunter's chest. Cas held Dean's lifeless body in his arms, aware that there was nothing more he could do. He waited there, mourning his best friend until Sam arrived. Now they were on their own.

**Author's Note:**

> I literally wanna throw myself off a cliff, I wrote this today and I think we should all suffer together. English is not my first language so if you found errors please let me know!!


End file.
